For my short stay in Singapore, I managed to squeeze in a few trips to the library. Man... I miss Singapore libraries n access to so many good books! I miss being able to lug home a huge stack of books that I'd never be able to get my hands on if I had to actually buy them!
One evening when I was at the library in Bedok, I was looking for a particular book about Natural History in the Youth section of the library when a young boy approached me. He looked about 14, and asked me for the time. Not realising that he actually had a handphone with him, I gave him the time, and continued browsing. He didn't leave, and stood there next to me, touching himself nervously. I don't mean "touching" himself like you know where, but his hands were nervously wiping his brow, neck, chest... Y'know...
So then he says to me, You boleh cakap Melayu? and I was like, Ya. Pleased, he continues, You dari Indonesia? and I say, No, Singapore. So he says, Saya juga orang Singapore. From the way his eyes dart about as he twitches nervously, I can tell he's a bit "off" up there lah. But get this. As I inch my way away from him, he approaches slowly and asks, "Can we be friends?"
It was SO WEIRD! Most people mistake me for a teacher 'cos apparently I look like one, what with my striking nerdus maximus looks n mak nenek character. I knew this boy was a bit mental, but I was so embarrassed I just replied, SAYA SUDAH KAHWIN LAH! SUDAH TUA! And then he was lagi embarrassed n backed off immediately, saying Sorry ya, Sorry ya as he disappeared behind the bookshelves, tail n goodness knows what between his legs.
Sometimes it's amusing when I get carded for certain reasons n it's a compliment that some people still think I look 17. But to be asked by a 14-year old boy if I wanted to be his friend? That's some scary shit man!
But if I was still 14... Is that how kids make friends these days? Is that how WE made friends back in those days? Well, my Mom used to think I went to the library as a teen to look at boys! I studied in an all-girls school by the way. But NO! I wasn't that despo. (And anyway, I had Sunday School to keep me entertained!) Some girls would wait all year for "inter-school" events just to check out the boys (or girls) from neighbouring schools. I remember if your classroom faced the school field, your teacher would have a rough time getting the girls to pay attention when there were 20 LaSalle prefects running around in their PE shorts.
Making friends, back then, and now, hasn't changed that much I guess. Back then, in primary school, we'd get friends to "sign" our autograph books. We'd write poems n phrases in these books, like "Trees are silver---Leaves are gold---Remember me---When you are old" or some corny shit like that. Now you've got these "autograph books" online, with friends leaving you messages n wishes in your Guestbook, or sending you virtual gifts n such.
Some of us wonder how real or genuine friendships are in the virtual world, like on Friendster, Facebook, Multiply, and other online "social networking" (i.o.w. dating) sites.
I lost touch with many of my friends from school, and have recently reunited with many of them online. But I got to asking, why we lost touch in the first place if we really were friends. Some of them are girls I've known since I was seven! Classmates from Standard 1 right up to Std 6, we practically grew up together, playing games like Ibu Ayam & Helang, and that darn rubberband skipping game that I never could master. We celebrated birthdays, report card days, Hari Sukan...
We went off to the same secondary school, but were divided into different classes, made new friends. These new friends soon went off to different classes too, as we were later divided into Arts and Science streams. So we made more new friends, somewhat leaving the old ones behind. I guess it was a quiet understanding, like, you go your way, I go my way... but yea, I'll remember you when I'm old.
And of course back then, we didn't have emails and online albums n kawan-ster stuff. If I was still in Malaysia, perhaps I may not have even bothered looking up old friends online. We take for granted what's right in front of us, and search for love, friendship and some form of gratification in a world made up of bits, bytes n pixels. Perhaps with careers, studies, spouses, kids, and what nots to juggle, there simply isn't enough time and space for every single friend you've made since kindergarten. Everything and everyone is just whizzing by at the speed of light. So we're only able to appreciate how "roses are red and violets are blue" when we're seated calmly in front of a computer.
I guess the hard truth is, things in the real world have become so superficial that virtual reality becomes What's Real to most of us. So whether it's online, at the library, on the MRT, at the mamak... I guess we can make friends anywhere. It's not really the "where", "when" or "how" that matters, but "Why".
One evening when I was at the library in Bedok, I was looking for a particular book about Natural History in the Youth section of the library when a young boy approached me. He looked about 14, and asked me for the time. Not realising that he actually had a handphone with him, I gave him the time, and continued browsing. He didn't leave, and stood there next to me, touching himself nervously. I don't mean "touching" himself like you know where, but his hands were nervously wiping his brow, neck, chest... Y'know...
So then he says to me, You boleh cakap Melayu? and I was like, Ya. Pleased, he continues, You dari Indonesia? and I say, No, Singapore. So he says, Saya juga orang Singapore. From the way his eyes dart about as he twitches nervously, I can tell he's a bit "off" up there lah. But get this. As I inch my way away from him, he approaches slowly and asks, "Can we be friends?"
It was SO WEIRD! Most people mistake me for a teacher 'cos apparently I look like one, what with my striking nerdus maximus looks n mak nenek character. I knew this boy was a bit mental, but I was so embarrassed I just replied, SAYA SUDAH KAHWIN LAH! SUDAH TUA! And then he was lagi embarrassed n backed off immediately, saying Sorry ya, Sorry ya as he disappeared behind the bookshelves, tail n goodness knows what between his legs.
Sometimes it's amusing when I get carded for certain reasons n it's a compliment that some people still think I look 17. But to be asked by a 14-year old boy if I wanted to be his friend? That's some scary shit man!
But if I was still 14... Is that how kids make friends these days? Is that how WE made friends back in those days? Well, my Mom used to think I went to the library as a teen to look at boys! I studied in an all-girls school by the way. But NO! I wasn't that despo. (And anyway, I had Sunday School to keep me entertained!) Some girls would wait all year for "inter-school" events just to check out the boys (or girls) from neighbouring schools. I remember if your classroom faced the school field, your teacher would have a rough time getting the girls to pay attention when there were 20 LaSalle prefects running around in their PE shorts.
Making friends, back then, and now, hasn't changed that much I guess. Back then, in primary school, we'd get friends to "sign" our autograph books. We'd write poems n phrases in these books, like "Trees are silver---Leaves are gold---Remember me---When you are old" or some corny shit like that. Now you've got these "autograph books" online, with friends leaving you messages n wishes in your Guestbook, or sending you virtual gifts n such.
Some of us wonder how real or genuine friendships are in the virtual world, like on Friendster, Facebook, Multiply, and other online "social networking" (i.o.w. dating) sites.
I lost touch with many of my friends from school, and have recently reunited with many of them online. But I got to asking, why we lost touch in the first place if we really were friends. Some of them are girls I've known since I was seven! Classmates from Standard 1 right up to Std 6, we practically grew up together, playing games like Ibu Ayam & Helang, and that darn rubberband skipping game that I never could master. We celebrated birthdays, report card days, Hari Sukan...
We went off to the same secondary school, but were divided into different classes, made new friends. These new friends soon went off to different classes too, as we were later divided into Arts and Science streams. So we made more new friends, somewhat leaving the old ones behind. I guess it was a quiet understanding, like, you go your way, I go my way... but yea, I'll remember you when I'm old.
And of course back then, we didn't have emails and online albums n kawan-ster stuff. If I was still in Malaysia, perhaps I may not have even bothered looking up old friends online. We take for granted what's right in front of us, and search for love, friendship and some form of gratification in a world made up of bits, bytes n pixels. Perhaps with careers, studies, spouses, kids, and what nots to juggle, there simply isn't enough time and space for every single friend you've made since kindergarten. Everything and everyone is just whizzing by at the speed of light. So we're only able to appreciate how "roses are red and violets are blue" when we're seated calmly in front of a computer.
I guess the hard truth is, things in the real world have become so superficial that virtual reality becomes What's Real to most of us. So whether it's online, at the library, on the MRT, at the mamak... I guess we can make friends anywhere. It's not really the "where", "when" or "how" that matters, but "Why".
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